Hey, look at what I finally got around to doing. http://daddydaze.net will now redirect here. The sad part is that I’ve owned that domain for over a year. Yes, I’m lazy.
Archive for October, 2006
Woo, look at that! Thanks to the generosity of Daddy Daze readers, my Donors Choose goal has been met! Together we raised $100 to help American teachers get the basic supplies they need to successfully work with our kids. One of the proposals I targeted as part of my challenge, "Basic Art Supplies," has been fully funded! The Gaffney, SC teacher who wrote this proposal had this to say:
"The previous teacher threw away everything in the store room thinking
she would get all new supplies. She did not stay and I inherited an Art
Program with absolutely nothing to work with. Since then, I have
received the absolute basic materials to conduct my classes. I have 600
students and approximately $600.00 in my budget. A dollar per student,
per year, doesn’t go very far. I want my students to have a better
experience with their exploration of Art, and this will require more
materials."
Thanks in part to your help, she’ll be able to buy crayons, colored pencils, colored markers, watercolor sets,
better quality paper (they had been using paper from the copy machine) and clay for ceramics. Awesome!
Again, thank you. I’m a former teacher, my wife is a teacher, my father is a teacher, my mother in law is a retired teacher…I know very well the challenges people in this profession face. Look for a new Daddy Daze Donors Choose challenge soon. We did it!
Tomorrow is Halloween, and you know what that means. I have to divide Grace’s candy into two piles: The "have’s" and the "potentially lethal." A few other holiday observations appear here in my current post at The Parenting Post. Check it out.
I don’t know when or where I first heard this saying, but I know it was well before I was a parent. In fact, I think it was even before I was an adult.
"The life of a parent is constant worry."
Today, I know that it’s absolutely true. I worry about the kids all the time. I mean All. The. Time. Grace isn’t smiling and I’m worried that she’s not a happy kid. William has a runny nose and I’m worried that he’s got an incurable disease. It’s horrible and it never stops.
Case in point: Last month the kids had "picture day" at Gracie’s preschool. A few days ago we got the pictures back. Grace looks so cute in her photo, but she isn’t wearing a broad, cheek-to-cheek smile. I take this to mean that she’s a chronically unhappy kid who probably has a psychological problem. I’ll ask her something like, "Who did you play with in school today?" She answers, "I just played by myself," and I can feel my insides turn black and die.
I know what’s going on, of course. People always tell me that Grace looks so much like me, and my wife says she’s definitely her "father’s daughter." I’m terrified that she’s going to become the same emotional and social train wreck that I am once she’s an adult, and I really can’t bear the idea.
Lord knows that I’m hardly a "guy" in the traditional sense. I can’t fix or build a goddamn thing, I don’t give a rat’s ass about most sports (I do watch football, but the world series is about as interesting as watching grass grow to me). I don’t spend my weekends fishing for stripers in the Atlantic, playing poker with my "buddies" (in fact, I don’t have any "buddies") or hoping that the Falcons will cover the spread. No, I’d rather listen to NPR or read one of my David Sedaris books. Sometimes I’ll take leave of my senses and tell one of the guys I know about how I stood quiet as a mouse in the house so that I wouldn’t disturb Gracie’s delicate rendition of "Five Little Pumpkins," and they look at me like I have nine heads. As a result of all of this, I feel out of place and uncomfortable around most other men, and don’t really have any friendships. Can you guess what I’m afraid is going to happen to William? That’s right, he’ll become the same inept Nancy-boy that I am. Sorry, son.
I’m seemingly not alone in my worrisome habits. My mother recently went to New York to visit her father who had been in the hospital for three days. Why did she wait that long? Because he didn’t tell his children that he was in the hospital, as he didn’t want them to worry about him. Ninety years old and he’s protecting his kids. I’m not exactly comforted by the fact that, 55 years from now, I’ll still be the basket case that I am today.
Now, I know that my perception of reality is probably quite skewed. I know that Grace does not have a psychological problem and that William isn’t going to succumb to sneezing. But that doesn’t mean I can dismiss these notions or that they aren’t any less real to me. Someone tell me that I’m crazy so that I can get on with my life, ok?
As you may know, my Grace has a peanut allergy. So far, it really hasn’t been an issue, as avoiding peanuts, peanut oil and such has been easy. Now that she’s in school, it’s starting to suck.
Different parents sign up to supply the snack each day (the politics of snack is another post entirely). Since Grace is peanut-free, we have to supply some alternate snacks just incase the parents bring in something questionable. No problem. When I pick her up from school each afternoon, there’s a little sheet in her cubby that outlines what they did on that day. Included is what the kids ate for snack. Today it said "cupcakes." "Ooh," I said to Grace, "You had cupcakes in school today?" "[teacher's name] said ‘No,’" she replied. "I just had my snack."
Perhaps I’m just projecting my own feelings onto her, but I felt terrible. All of her classmates are enjoying some nice cupcakes while she sits there with the fuckin’ Teddy Grams for the upteenth time. I told the teacher that cupcakes are really fine, but she said that they can’t guarantee that homemade snacks weren’t prepared with peanuts/peanut oil, or on the same counter/with the same knife that had been in contact with peanut butter.
The fact is, I should be glad the teachers are so dilligent. They just want to keep my kid safe, and I do honeslty appreciate it. It also bums me out to think of Grace, 3 years old and already excluded in a way. F’n peanuts.
I can’t let this go. The Daring Young Mom recently took a look at some of the less-than-contemporary themes that run through several Disney princess movies. Not only is a marriage depicted as the single goal of a woman’s life, many of the Disney movies depict single parents. It’s weird.
Snow White: No parents in sight, though Snow herself is essentially "mother" to the seven dwarves, movie culminates in a marriage
Belle: Single father, movie culminates in a marriage
Jasmine: Single father, movie culminates in a marriage
Cinderella: Single father dies in the opening act, movie culminates in a marriage
Little Mermaid: Single father, movie culminates in a marriage
Sleeping Beauty: No parents, movie culminates in a marriage
Bambi: Mother dies in opening act, single father
The Lion King: Single father, who eventually dies
Finding Nemo: Mother and all but one child die in opening scene (I know that his is technically a Pixar movie, but it was distributed by Disney)
The Parent Trap: Two little Lindsay Lohans struggle to reunite their estranged parents
Mary Poppins: They’re married, but they all but ignore the kids
Pinocchio: Single "father"
Dumbo: Single mother
The Jungle Book: He was essentially raised by jungle animals
Toy Story: We see the kid’s mother, but not father
Weird, huh?
It’s time. Fill them with sugar and watch ‘em go. What are you going to do (at left you see Baby Chewbacca and Strawberry Shortcake chillin’ on the steps, Halloweeen ‘05)? My neighborhood his mostly summer folk, so it’s pretty deserted around here right now. We’ll go to "Boo At The Zoo" on Saturday (they decorate the animal’s habitats and put out crafts for the kids to do…it’s awfully cute) and then do the daytime trick-or-treating on Main St. come The Big Day. We did that last year, and it was extremely cute. The shop owners decorate the places and hand out candy. We’re done by sundown and, best of all, no creepy strangers to worry about (I’m a bit phobic).
So, what are your plans? And more importantly, what will the kiddies be wearing (Bill is a Dog this year and Grace is Snow White)?!?
Earlier today I came across a very beautiful post at Woman, Wife, Mother. Author Savannah feels the full weight of a quiet moment in her home:
"…My two incredible little girls were asleep in their beds, smiling,
dreaming. My husband and dog were lazing on the couch watching T.V.
Everyone in my house – at that moment – happy and content. I did it -
we did it…Achieved the dream…"
I had a similar experience this afternoon. As I may have mentioned before, when Grace was teeny tiny, we used to sing "The Rainbow Connection" to her as her lullaby. She’s been interested in talking about "when I was a baby" with her mother and I lately, and my wife told her that "Rainbow" was one of the songs we used to sing to her way back then. Now, if my wife is the one to tuck Grace in at night, she’ll ask for her "lullabys." Of course, my wife is happy to oblige.
Earlier today, Grace was in her room where she was (supposed to be) napping, and I hear her tiny voice from the other side of the closed door:
"Why are there so many songs about rainbows, and what’s on the other side…" She did the whole 1st and 2nd verse. I muted the TV and just stood as quietly as I could outside her door. I thought to myself, "I could literally die right now, as I know this is as happy as I’ll ever be." In that sweet moment, she was happy and content, and that’s due to my wife and me. How freakin’ great is that?
Incidentally, the Sarah McLachlan cover of "Rainbow Connection" on the album For The Kids is stellar [iTunes Store link].
…check out what I chose to do as an outing with the kids last week. Can you say, "Lame-o?" Yes, you can.
I plan on joining your ranks. With my great Nike+ iPod kit, I’m slowing becoming a runner. You can check out what I’ve been up to on the road at One More Mile, my new running blog. I know, I know, I need to stop creating blogs. Sue me.
